From the Alphabet Series: W

Said Pretzel Gee Worthless,
wielding his withered Wand:

It’s weakilated, worryatin’,
and to women
won’t respond!

I wish a worthy wanker
to woodify and wow
the Wookie women
in my world.
I need a whopper now!

I’ve squeezed on every part of it.
I’ve pulled it hard, and jerked -
Often enough
to know it’s broke.
Why won’t my willy work?


© badpoet

My Date with Nate

We ate bait
on my date with Nate
Sitting on crates
in the night very late.

To conjugate,
I just couldn’t wait
for love to sate
like fine opiate.

But it wasn't my fate
to find such a mate,
cuz sadly for me
Nate couldn’t inflate.

© badpoet

George only-slightly Drunk

George Only-Slightly Drunk
fell from his oily bunk
and with a loud ker-plunk
gouged from the floor a chunk

and when the hole did flood
with thousands’ precious blood
George Only-Slightly Drunk
in sorry mood did sunk.

He prayed to God,
Please save the oil.
The rest is only junk!


© badpoet